Week 8 - How do I get over some things in my past for which I feel very guilty?

The Lovers/King of Pentacles/10 of Wands

The first card in this spread talks about choice. Yes, it is called The Lovers, but here the lovers are choosing to do something and taking full responsibility for the consequences of their choice. The second card represents a person in power, who has, through his experience and skill amassed sufficient wealth and prosperity and is someone the world can turn to guidance for. The third card represents a man trying his best to carry all the wands he has been handed (by fate or free will) and has his back turned towards us, the witnesses of his journey, the audience of his film. What is common between all these people and all these cards?

Look at their faces. In the first card, the woman is looking at the angel above. The man in the card is looking at her. Their arms are open, and therefore they are in an active position, waiting to do something, listening for instructions. Thinking, processing, in the present, with the intention of moving forward. In the second card, we see the King of Pentacles intently listening to someone. His face is tilted to one side and his gaze suggests that he is looking at someone. Maybe someone has come to ask him for advice. Maybe someone has come to ask him for orders. He is in the middle of a conversation and he is busy. Thinking, processing. This is probably what his work-day looks like. In the third card, we see a man heading towards a place where there are living quarters. He is carrying ten sticks, which is proving to be quite a handful. But this is his task in the moment and he is focused on his wands, making sure he doesn’t drop any and delivers them where he is meant to. His feet suggest that he is walking fast towards his destination.

Photo by Marek Szturc on Unsplash

Now you may wonder, where am I going with all these descriptions? You may say, “There are no guilty faces here. What could these cards suggest about my query?” Well, the cards have a common theme and that is the key to the door you are trying to unlock. Guilt is something that thrives in focus. What I mean to say is that guilt is something that you feel when you focus on it. If your focus was to be directed in other directions, neither would you feel guilty, nor would you think about that which you associate with guilt.

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Yes, I am talking about your actions. Your past. The things that make you feel guilty. Have you made thinking about them a part of your day? Well, that’s a choice and a choice that can be changed. If I told you that you only have 24 hours in a day (something you already know), limited energy (something you already know), and unlimited goals (something you already know), would you choose to add feeling guilty to your list of things to do?

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To this you might say, “What was done was wrong! It is natural for me to feel guilty. It comes without thinking. I’m not choosing to feel this way.” To this, the answer again lies in the cards. Everyone here is living in the now. There is no brooding. There is no losing oneself in thoughts. It is daytime. There is action happening. And the movements are taking one from the present into the future. Because, the past has no space in these stories.

Photo by Arjan de Jong on Unsplash

As cliched as it may sound, the past is gone. What’s done is done. You have work to do in the present. If guilt is still tugging at your heart, CHOOSE not to answer its call. It will not bring you any new insight. It will only make you feel sorry for someone else. It will waste some of those hours and energy you need for your unlimited dreams. But they don’t need that. They don’t need your guilt. They probably don’t need anything. Because they’re busy making different choices, working, and moving in the direction of their desires/destiny.

And then you may say, “but what about repentance? How will I make sure I do not repeat this mistake unless I feel bad about making it?” And to this I ask, who told you that? Who told you that you must punish yourself to make sure you don’t repeat something you no longer wish to do? Does that work? I will not answer this for you.

I am sure all these characters, and archetypes have had their own share of guilt. But today is not the day to spend on it. The guilt can be laid to rest. And once you decide to do that, you may discover the real purpose of that mistake - the lesson. Guilt is a feeling. Lessons bring wisdom. You need the latter to move forward. So take that, and run forward.