An essential prerequisite for any main character to come into their own is absolute honesty with self and others.
Imagine yourself as an actor in a film. You have signed up for the role of the main character. But there is no script. You are asked to improvise and make up lines as you go along with the other characters. Would you know what to say and do? How far would you have to go from who you are outside the film set to embody that role and its traits? Are you willing to make the journey? If yes, keep reading.
Becoming the main character would require you to be ethical and trustworthy. Not in a “goody two shoes” way but in a way that sets a boundary around you that proclaims that this is what you tolerate from others as well. No ulterior motives or hidden agendas can be harboured within or tolerated from outside. You have to work hard to build your empire whether it is a happy family or a successful business or a soul tribe with a vision that is uniquely yours. You have to lead by example and no one can think for you. You have to search for individuals who can help you realise your dreams and let go of those that threaten them. Your dream, your vision needs to matter to you more than how people around you feel about you and your choices. It is an extremely lonely journey. Even if you gather support, you will be alone when you make plans. Being the main character comes with a lot of responsibility for yourself and those that choose to walk with you. People will come in and go out as and when their purpose demands and you will have to accept and let them go with equal ease. You cannot let your emotions weaken you but your emotions are useful in guiding your actions. Be discerning with them. Detachment is key to keeping your eyes on the path. Yes, the path. What is it? Where does it lead? How are you planning to make the journey? As a main character you need to know all this. Yes, plans and strategies can change along the way. But always have a map to begin with and add details on it as you go along.
If this seems exasperating or too hard to do, it may not be time for you to be the main character of your life. But if and when you are willing to go the distance, there are two more things you need to focus on. The main character receives something from the world and also gives something to it.
Be willing to receive criticism from others. It is a great idea to understand your own bullshit and ways in which you have kept yourself in the “side character energy”. We are unable to see everything about ourselves and a fresh pair of judgmental eyes can sometimes be the perfect bitter pill that is needed to heal a stubborn ailment. Reach out to people who are close enough to know the real you and brave enough to speak their mind to you. Allow yourself to face your demons, shadows and self-sabotaging tendencies so that you can integrate them or release them as needed. Tough love works great for the main character. It is like a fire that is essential for your transformation. Also, receive information about your deeds with others. How have your actions affected those around you? Is there something there that needs to change? Have your actions come from a conscious place or have you been doing things unconsciously? Going forward, every step will have to be taken purposefully. The law of cause and effect is a great compass for the aspiring main character to navigate their path. The less karmic debt you keep, the faster you move forward. Forgive, let go, make amends, apologize, pay back or give forward. Learn new ways of being, change your philosophy and even believe in something new that might serve you better going forward. Receive feedback, introspect on it, and allow yourself to change. In your daring to look back, you will help the path forward become clearer. Can you lighten up by letting go of some baggage from the past? Yes, yes you can.
Be willing to give your presence and new found enthusiasm to people and projects that come in your path. As the old leaves your life, space is created for the new to enter. Even if it doesn’t directly align with your desired goals, lean in and participate. There is something to be learned, experienced and created through each of these encounters. Say “yes” to new opportunities, even the one’s that don’t make sense. What is the worst that can happen? Failure? Time lost? Money lost? Yes, possibly. But this is all part of your journey. A main character is open to new experiences. It gives itself to life. Your seeking spirit is infectious and by sharing it with others, you can create meaningful connections for the short and the long run. New doors and possibilities can appear where there were none. And by becoming useful in newer environments, you will meet new parts of yourself. Parts you never knew existed within you. The main character participates in life. Gets out of the house. Meets people. Makes things happen. Comes away with a story to tell and memories to keep. And nothing in this makes them feel like a side character. Because they are showing up as themselves, not as someone that others need them to be. Give yourself to the world and keep moving forward. There is something deeply freeing in this experience. You are not tied down to the giving. Your goals, your path are always there to call you back to it.
In this way, you can unlock the possibility of becoming the main character in your life. The question is, are you ready to walk the distance?
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